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new script excerpt

so I’m working on a new script. it’ll never get made thanks to the language, violence, and womanizing, well, woman. *snicker*

let me know what you think (and ignore formatting here)! this is the introductory scene of our main character. also? I have no title! all suggestions are welcome!

logline: Best friends set out on an interstellar romp that leads them into gunfights, a kidnapping, sword fights, a bordello, lesbian assassins and true love. What’s not to write home about?

————————-
INT. BEDROOM – DAY
Feminine moans escape from under a blanket on a large bed. Two bodies move underneath in an obvious way. The volume grows until the WOMAN screams in orgasm.

Seconds pass before the Woman shoves down the blanket, panting and grinning in satisfaction.

WOMAN
Mmmm. Very, very nice. They weren’t kidding about you.

Sweaty and grinning, JANE RADOWSKI, mid-30’s, wild-child who uses guns like an extension of her hands, thrusts aside the blankets.

JANE
You ain’t seen nothin’ yet, honey. That’s just the warm-up.

Banging at the door interrupts a long, lusty kiss.

WOMAN
Oh, crap!

JANE
Problem?

WOMAN
Only if it’s my husband.

JANE
Oh, crap!

They both scramble out of bed, stark naked, and grab clothes.

HUSBAND (O.S.)
God damn it, woman, let me in before I break it down!

Jane looks at the Woman, who nods.

JANE
Figures.

Hopping into her pants, Jane grabs her gun belt and buckles it on even before putting on her shirt. She runs to the lone window, peers outside.

POV: A long, long drop down to a concrete alley.

JANE (CONT’D)
Well that’s not going to work.

The door BURSTS open. She spins, gun instantly in hand and aimed at the large, furious MAN.

JANE (CONT’D)
Okay, now, let’s not get carried away here. I didn’t know she was married and I have a gun. Back away from the door, buddy.

He charges.

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About Nancy M. Griffis

Author and screenwriter who loves scifi/action/adventure/urban fantasy genres. I have two published novels, Mind Games and Eternal Investigations, as well as a short story published for charity called "Home Fires Burning." All are available through amazon.com and barnesandnobles.com.

Discussion

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Nancy at the Tim Burton exhibit in L.A.

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